Harry Potter & Co Go to the Grocery Store
by SugarSugarHyperLolly
Summary: This is basically just Harry Potter and co. deciding to go to the grocery store. it's random humor mixed with some inside jokes between friends whom are in here as well so if u like strange spastic humor with no real plot line then ull like this. :
1. Chapter 1

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

~ I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling.

Chapie 1

Ron: Dammit Luna, stop filling the pool with chocolate pudding!

Luna stops splashing around in the chocolatey goop and makes a super big eyed sad face.

Luna: But…but I like pudding.

Ron: I don't care!

Ron poofs the pudding away with a flick of his wand.

Luna: Noooooooooooooooo! My puuuuuuuuuddddddddiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnggggggg!!!!! * drops dramatically to knees and screams at the heavens*

Hermione then walks out of the house looking slightly pertebed.

Ron: What's wrong Hermione?

Hermione: It's Harry again. Come see.

They walk off while Luna is still screaming over her lost pudding. They enter the house to see Harry repeatedly banging his head against the wall.

Harry: Angst angst angst angst…..

Ron: What's wrong Harry?

Harry looks over with tear stained eyes.

Harry: We're out of……. RAAAAAAMMMMMEEEEEENNNNNN!

Harry breaks out into hysterical sobbing.

At this point Draco enters the scene and giddily runs over to Harry and puts his finger to his lips.

Draco: Shush girl! Shut your lips! Do the Helen Keller, and and talk with your hips!

Hermione pimp slaps him.

Hermione: HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO SPONTANEOUSLY BREAK INTO SONG AND DANCE!!!!

Draco runs off crying.

Ron: Well, anyways….. Harry we can just go to the grocery store and get some more.

Hermione walks over to the cupboards, opens them and is viciously attacked by moths.

Hermione: Yeah, we could pick up some other things as well.

Harry sniffles and rubs his eyes.

Harry: *sniff* ok.

And as if on cue Ginny, Draco, and Luna come in.

All in unison: We wanna come!

Hermione: Ugh, ok ever to the car.

They all pile in the car and put there seatbelts on. Draco stares into the audience.

Draco: Even wizards wear their seatbelts. BUCKLE UP AMERICA!

And they all head off to the supermarket.

Well that was the first chapie hope you enjoyed plz review!


	2. Chapter 2

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 2

Harry strode toward the automatic doors and waved his arm epically.

Harry: YES! All muggle doors fear my extreme wandless magic. Now. . . I have come for your women, your riches, and your ramen. SUBMIT!

Random Greeter: Welcome to Wal-Mart. Get your shit and get out.

The rest of the gang follows Harry reluctantly as he marches stubbornly towards a man waiting at a cash register. This man is about seven feet tall and is watching Harry and co. cautiously.

Harry: You, there. Half-giant! You shall tell me the location of the sacred Ramen of Shrimpy Wisdom or--

Ron: But I don't like shrimp. . . .

Harry: SILENCE! Now, half-giant. Reveal to me the location of the Ramen of Deathly Deliciousness or I shall whisper naughty nothings to this sandwi--

Draco chooses this moment to leap onto the moving conveyor belt, dragging Ginny along.

Draco: Come on, Eileen!!!! TOO RA LOO RA TOO RA LOO RYE AAAAAAAA!!!!!!

At this time the Walmart police officer comes up, stares at them for a moment before shoving them off the conveyor belt to land face first onto the floor. Oddly enough this ends their musical interlude. Hermione stares at the officer starry eyed.

Hermione: Thank you so much um….. *looks at nametag* Priscilla!

Priscilla skips away to the donuts while whistling Dixie.

They all turn back to the half-giant.

Harry: Now, you will relinquish the whereabouts of the Magical Ramen no or there will be DIRE CONSEQUENCES!!!!

Cashier: It's on isle three.

Harry: Well then……thank you erm….. *stares at nametag* Chris! That's an odd name for a half-giant. Oh well then.

They all proceed to the Mysterious Isle Three.

Well that's the end of chapie 2 hope you enjoyed! Plz review! J


	3. Chapter 3

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 3

They approach the Mysterious Isle Three only to have their path blocked by this crazed looking man with a mop.

Harry: You there! Move aside, and put away your weapon or I will obliterate you!

The man looks up and blinks confusedly. They stand there for a while before Ginny comes over and comments.

Ginny: Wow! He looks just like you Harry, you know, if you were on crack or something.

Harry: DOPLGANGER!!?? I SHALL VANQUISH YOU WITH MY MIGHTY POWER!

The man just sticks the mop in Harry's face and proceeds to clean him.

Janitor: Take my mighty mop power!

Harry: I SUBMIT!

Harry stands up and wipes off his face.

Harry: Your filthy water is strong. BUT MY WILL TO LIVE IS STRONGER…..um……DAVID!!!!

David dumps bucket of nasty water on Harry's head before skipping off for a granola break.

Harry curls up in the corner and sobs while growing mushrooms.

Ron: Hey there's the ramen!

They all run to the ramen only to be beaten for the last cup by two girls.

Draco: Hey! That's our ramen!

The girls look at each other.

Girls: FLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *runs off with the cup of ramen*

Ron: Get 'em!

And the epic chase ensues!

They run around for a while before tiring out.

Hermione: Oh screw this!

Hermione levitates the two girls and grabs the cup of ramen.

Girl 1: Aw sadface.

Girl 2: Yes, sadface indeed.

Girls in unison: Oh well you guys win.

They drop to the ground on there face.

Ron: Who are you and why did you run off with the ramen?

Girl1: I'm Angee, and this is Maci. *points to girl2* We were hungry and wanted to play.

Luna: I found pudding.

Everyone looks over at Luna.

Everyone in unison: Where in the hell have you been?!

Luna holds up half eaten pudding cup.

Luna: Pudding.

Everyone in unison: *slaps forehead*

Hermione: Well, we also need meat. Let's head that way next.

Maci & Angee in unison: We wanna come and help!

Hermione: Fine.

They all head towards the meat department.

Well that's chapie 3. Hope you enjoyed! Plz review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 4

They get to the meat department.

Hermione: Well, this steak looks good.

Ginny: That meat looks scary huge!

Draco picks up an arm full of meat and throws it into the air.

Draco: AAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA! I NEEDA HERO! I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO TILL THE END OF THE NIGHT! AND HE'S GOTTA BE--

Hermione slaps him in the face with a salami.

Angee: Aw kill joy.

Maci: Yeah! I was gonna eat that salami and say naughty nothings to it.

All of a sudden this random guy comes up and hugs everyone. Everyone blinks.

Random Guy: I was hiding behind the meat because I love you.

Ron: Erm… okaaaaaaaayyyyy.

Random Guy: I am Byron. And I'm gonna follow you guys around from now on.

Luna: Yay! He's sooooo cute! Can we keep him?! I'll feed him, and wash him and change his paper! Who's a good Byron!? Who's a good Byron!?

Byron: I am!

Hermione: Oh dear lord.

Then a random girl comes out from where Byron was hiding and wraps him on the head with some bologna.

Random Girl: Bad Byron! Following people around again shame on you! If you don't be good I'll trade you in for the poodle.

Byron wimpers.

Byron: NOT THE POODLE NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I LOOOOOOOVVVVVVEEEE YOOOOOOOOOUUUUU CHEEEEEEELLLLLLLSSSSSSSEEEEEEAAAAAAA!!!! (if you can't read that it says chelsea)

Draco points at Byron.

Draco: YOU AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A HOUND DOG! CRYIN' ALL THE TI--

Byron bites Draco's finger. Draco runs off crying. Maci and Angee fall over in hysterical laughter. Then David re-enter's scene.

David: Dear god! There's meat everywhere! *Falls dramatically to his knees and picks up the meat holding it close to his face* YOU MONSTERS! YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU'VE DONE!

Priscilla enters scene and slaps David.

Priscilla: Get ahold of yourself man!

David: Ok. But now we will follow you to make sure that you won't throw anymore precious meat!

Hermione: Whatever. We also need milk.

They head their way to the dairy department.

Well that's it for chapie 4! Hope you enjoyed! Plz review!


	5. Chapter 5

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything! It all belongs JK Rowling!

Chapie 5

Hermione: Ok. Everyone in a single filed line please! I want this as orderly as possible.

Everyone else: NEVER!

Hermione: Do it or else!

Everyone else: OK!

They get to the dairy department. Ginny shivers.

Ginny: It's cold over here.

Draco: I LIKE THE WAY YOU DO THAT RIGHT THURR RIGHT THURR!

Hermione: ENOUGH!

Draco: *blows raspberries*

Hermione: Ok we've got the milk. I think that's enough for today.

They all head back to Chris's register.

Chris: That'll be $11.62.

Harry: I REFUSE TO PAY YOUR $11.62!!!

Chris: Why?

Harry: BECAUSE I'M FAMOUS! SEE?! I HAVE A LIGHTNING BOLT SHAPED SCAR ON MY FOREHEAD! THAT MEANS I PAY NOTHING!

Chris: Pay or I'll step on you.

Harry: Well then…. That's oddly compelling half-giant.

Chris: I'm not a half-giant……just tall.

Harry: Whatever half-giant. Now carry my bags to the broom.

Hermione: Harry, we drove here.

Harry: TO THE BROOOOOOOOOM! SUBMIT!

Chris: Fine.

Chris picks up bags and helps them to the car. Then all of a sudden they all ambush him and shove him in the car to be taken home. (poor chris) They drive away with Draco attempting another song, but being smacked in the face with Chris's extremely large shoe.

Well that's it for chapie 5 hope you enjoyed plz review! (by the way sry it was soooooo short promise the next few will be a lil longer)


	6. Chapter 6

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 6

They arrive at the homestead and all get out.

Chris: Um, why was I kidnapped?

Everyone hugs him.

Everyone in unison: We looooooooooove yooooooouuuuuu!

Chris: But, if I don't get back soon my pet Whaley will be worried!

Luna: We'll just poof him here.

POOF

A piece of paper lands in Chris's hands with a picture of a narwhale on it.

Chris: *Looks endearingly at the picture* Are you hungry? *Pulls out fish flakes from pocket and sprinkles it on the paper*

Ron: Are you feeding a picture?

Chris: Yes. Yes I am.

Hermione: Ah the mailman's here!

Runs over to mailman and gets mail.

Hermione: Thank you Sam.

Sam: You're welcome.

Angee pops up behind Hermione picks up Sam and runs him into the house. She comes out and closes the door behind her. Everyone stares.

Maci: What was that?

Angee: I want him.

Maci: Ok then.

At this time everyone heads into the house.

Sam: Um….. Why?

Angee: Because I want you.

Sam: Ok. *sits down*

Byron lays on the floor with Chelsea tossing a ball back and forth with him. All of a sudden the doorbell rings and Byron runs over super excitedly and answers it.

Byron: IT'S THE PIZZA MAN!!!

Hermione: Who ordered pizza?

Ron: Me.

Hermione: Why we just went to the store and got food.

Ron: Because Hermione! Because!

Hermione: Ok then.

Pizza Man: Here you go. That'll be…..

Harry: NO! NO MORE PAYING FOR STUFF! YOU UNDERESTIMATE THHE IMPORTANCE OF MY SCAR!!!!!!!

Pizza Man: Ok, then I get some of the pizza.

Harry: FINE! UM…….. SCOTT!

Draco grabs the pizza and spins in a circle.

Draco: SHE'S A DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCE DANCIN' MACHINE!

Hermione grabs the pizza and smack him with it.

Hermione: NO!

Angee & Maci in unison: NOOOOOOOOO! YOU'LL BRUISE THE PRECIOUS PIZZA!!!!

Maci picks up a slice of pizza lovingly.

Maci: Oh poor baby! I'll fix you up……. *chomp*

David: NOOOO! I wanted to fix that piece!

Maci: Well too bad! Bwahahahahhahaha!

David: Sadface.

Sam: You guys are so weird…….. VERY NICE!

Priscilla: I will insert words here since I have not talked in a while.

Angee: I want to be a wizard!

Everyone else (that's not part of the harry potter clan): Us too!

Hermione: Then let's get yall sorted!

Ginny: Um..... I don't think that's how it works.

Draco: Oh pipe down you're adopted and nobody loves you.

Ron: Hey!.........Hey!..........Hey!...........Hey............Hey... that's not true.

Hermione: Don't care. I'm gonna do it anyways.

Everyone: Okey dokey then!

Well that's it for chapie 6 hope u enjoyed plz review!


	7. Chapter 7

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 7

Hermione: Harry, get the sorting hat.

Harry pulls sorting hat from pants.

Hermione: Um, Harry….. Why was the sorting hat in your pants.

Harry: I always keep the sorting hat in my pants.

Hermione: Um……ok. Anyways…. Who's first.

David: OOOOOOOO ME!

Hermione places hat on David's head.

Sorting Hat: Hm…. WaddleStomp!

Ron: Um,……that's not a house.

Sorting Hat: Oh, sorry. I've had too much to drink. Um, Gryffindor!

David: Wheeee!

David skips away. Next up comes Priscilla.

Sorting Hat: Hmmmmmm, Hufflepuff!

Priscilla grins and eats donut. Next up is Sam.

Sorting Hat: Slytherin!!

Sam: VERY NICE! I knew I was evil all along!

Next up comes Scott.

Sorting Hat: Hm…. Hufflpuffer!

Scott: I want a hot pocket…….

Next up comes Maci.

Sorting Hat: Slytherin!!!

Maci: Bwahahahahahaha!!!!! I knew it!

Maci runs off somewhere. Next up is Angee.

Sorting Hat: Hufflepuff!!!

Angee: WHAAAAAAAA!

Next up comes Chris.

Chris: So your pants you say?

Harry: Yes.

Chris: I don't know how I feel about all that then.

Hermione shoves the hat on Chris's head.

Chris: EW! IT SMELLS OF CHEESE! AND PANTS!!!!

Sorting Hat: Ravenclaw!!!!!!!!

Chris leaves to go wash hair. Next comes Chelsea.

Sorting Hat: Ravenclaw!!!!!

Chelsea: YYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!!!!! I'm gonna do the happy dance now!

Chelsea dances sporadically. Next is Byron.

Sorting Hat: Gryffindor!!!!!

Byron wags tail. Then there's a random knock at the door. Byron answers it.

Byron: IT'S PEOPLE!!!!

In walks Christi, Skip, Meagan, and Daniel because we forgot them and they need to be in this story so here they are.

Christi: We're here and ready to be sorted!

Hermione puts sorting hat on Christi.

Sorting Hat: Ravenclaw!!!!!!

Christi: I knew it.

Christi walks away. Next to come is Meagan.

Sorting Hat: Slytherin!!!!!!

Meagan: WHHAAAAAAAA I DON'T WANT SLYTHERIN!!!! I WANT RAVENCLAW!!!!!!!

Sorting Hat: YOU GET WHAT I GIVE YOU AND SILENCE!!!!SUBMIT!

Meagan Pouts. Next is Skip.

Sorting Hat: Gryffindor!!!!

Skip gets up and finds Christi. Lastly is Daniel.

Hermione places the sorting hat on Daniel's head. The hat then bursts into flames and falls as a pile of ash to the floor. Everyone looks from the ash to Daniel.

Ron: What the hell was that?!

Daniel: I choose Slytherin.

Daniel walks off to go smoke some weed.

Angee: Well, now what?

Luna: Pudding?

Ron: NO!

Luna runs off crying.

All of a sudden a stage rises from the floor and a disco ball from the ceiling. Then Carmelldansen starts playing.

Draco: WE CELBRATE WITH THE CARMELL DANCE!

Everyone but Hermione, Sam, Chris, and Daniel(who is no where to be found) starts dancing in synchronization.

Draco: YOU WILL DANCE!!!!!

Draco charms them into dancing with Chris giving him his die and burn glare.

And they all dance till sundown!

Well that's chapie 7 hope you like plz review


	8. Chapter 8

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 8

Next Day

Ron: Damn it's hot in here!

Luna: I'll cool you off! *throws pudding in his face*

Ron: ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN PUDDING!

Luna runs off crying.

Scott: Ah jeeze. It is hot…….

Maci & Angee in unison: Let's all go to Wal-mart and get pool toys then magically make a pool appear!

Chris: Um, if you don't mind me asking, why do we need to buy stuff when we can magically poof it here?

Sam: Yeah. It just seems like a wasted trip to me.

Christi: Because they like to make things difficult…..

Sam: Oh…. I see. Well then….

Harry: SILENCE! TO THE ESCALADE!!!!

Ginny: Um Harry. We don't have an Escalade.

Harry: YES WE DO! IT'S WHAT WE DRIVE IN!

Hermione: Um no….. that's a Honda.

Harry: NO! NO IT'S NOT! IT'S AN ESCALADE! *poofs car into an Escalade*

Ron: Well, I guess that works too.

Sam: NO! *poofs car into an Aston Martin*

Maci: NO! *poofs car into Chevelle*

Chris: Um… Maci that's not gonna fit all of us. It's a two seater.

Maci: NO! IT'LL WORK!

Chris: No. *poofs car into date rape van*

Everyone looks over at Chris.

Everyone: Um…… Chris?

Chris: What? Whaley likes to be comfortable when we go on rides.

Chelsea: No. *poofs car into reliable mini van* That's better.

Everyone: NOOOOOOOO NOT THE MINI VAAAAAAAN!

Skip poofs mini van into a short bus.

Skip: Because you're all retarded. We'll meet you there.

Skip, Christi, and Daniel fly away on there broom sticks.

Meagan: why don't we just take our broom sticks too?

Angee: BECAUSE MEAGAN! BECAUSE!

Priscilla: Yeah that would just be faster anyways.

Angee flies off on broom.

Everyone left: Well then…….TO THE BROOOOOOOMS!

They all fly off towards Wal-mart.

That's it for chapie 8. Hope you enjoyed! Plz review! sry this is the shortest one yet ill right a longer one next time!


	9. Chapter 9

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

I don't own anything. All courtesy of JK Rowling!

Ps. This whole chapter mostly requests from things people want to see. So it may be a little scattered J

Chapie 9

They come up to the doors of the Wal-mart and they go inside. All of a sudden the doors slam shut and lock behind them.

Ron: Hey what the hell is going on here?!

They look at the doors to see Draco standing outside pouting.

Hermione: What the hell Draco?!

Draco: I'm not opening the doors till I get to sing a song with everyone, and not get hit.

Hermione: No!

Angee & Maci: Oh come on Hermione! It's just one song. Pleeeeeeease.

Hermione: Fine! But only if I get to pick the song.

Draco: Yay!

Draco opens the doors and walks in.

Draco: What song?

Hermione: *mumble mumble*

Priscilla: What?

Hermione: The Water Buffalo Song.

Everyone: *blink blink* Like from Veggie Tales?

Hermione: Yes…..

Draco: Ok! Everyone together now!

Everyone: Everybody's got a water buffalo. Your's I fast but mine is slow. Where'd we get them I don't know. But everybody's got a water buffalo. I took my buffalo to the store. Got his head stuck in a door. Spilt some lima beans on the floor. Cause everybody's got a water buffalo!

Angee: Look! There's one! *points at Byron*

Scott: Nope, that's a dog.

Harry: ENOUGH! SUBMIT!!!!!! WE CAME FOR THE MAGICAL POOL ACOOTRAMENTS!!! ONWARD!

Maci: I want tuna. I'm hungry for your special tuna Angee.

Angee: Ok.

Angee disappears behind an isle for a few minutes before returning with a bowl full of tuna.

Angee: Here you go.

Maci starts chomping down like there's no tomorrow.

David: So what is the special ingredient anyways?

Angee: Whaley.

Chris looks over and sees little pieces of paper mixed in the tuna.

Chris: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! WHAAAAAAALLLLLEEEEEEEYYYYYY!!!!!!

Chris snatches bowl from Maci and starts smearing the tuna onto his tear stained face.

Chris: WHY?! WHY WHALEY?! HE WAS SUCH A GOOD LITTLE NARWHALE!!

Angee: He looked tasty so I put him in the mix.

Chris: NOOOOOO!!!! *runs off with bowl in hand*

Chelsea: *walks over* What was that?

Maci: Tuna.

Chelsea: Ewah!

Maci: I like tuna….. But I prefer salmon.

Chelsea: Ewah!

Maci: Well no one asked you to eat any.

Angee: I like sepsis.

Sam: Um….. Angee?

Angee: Yes Sam?

Sam: Nevermind.

Luna: I want to ride the slip-n-slide.

Everyone except Chis (who is mourning the loss of his pet): OK!!!

They all finally head to the pool toys isle.

_______________________________________________________

Well that's it for chapie 9. Hope you enjoyed! Plz read and review!

IN LOVING MEMORY OF WHALEY

You will be missed!


	10. Chapter 10

**Harry Potter & Co. go to the Grocery Store**

I own nothing. It all belongs to JK Rowling!

Chapie 10

They enter the large extravagant isle for the pool toys.

Harry: I feel like a kid in the toy isle of a store!

Hermione: Um…. You are Harry.

Harry: SILENCE!!

Chris comes walking up with a large grin and pelican perched on his shoulder.

Scott: Um….. Chris. What's with the pelican?

Chris: His name is Sal.

Sam: Short for Sally?

Chris: Nope.

Sam: Ok then.

Priscilla: Look! The slip-n-slides!

They rip open and shoot water from their wands to wet it.

David sprays water in Harry's face.

David: Sorry. Someone drew on your forehead so I washed it off.

Harry wipes his forehead to reveal red smeared ink where his "scar" used to be. He drops down dramatically to his knees and yells at the heavens.

Harry: NOOOOOOOOO! MY SCAAAAAAAR!!! THE SOURCE OF ALL MY POPULARITY!!

Harry runs off crying.

Chelsea: Well then….. SLIP-N-SLIDE TIME!

Luna: I'll make it better!

Ron: NO! LUNA! DON'T!!

Luna sprays pudding down the slip-n-slide.

Sam: DAMN YOU LUNA LOVEGOOOOOD!

She poofs herself into a bathing suit with little radishes all over it and slides down.

Luna: WHHEEEEEEEEE!

Everyone: Oh well.

Everyone poofs into their bathing suits. Except Chris. Who I've put in a cheerleader's outfit. (all for the author's selfish purposes)

Draco: OH MICKEY YOU'RE SO FINE! YOU'RE SO FINE YOU BLOW MY MIND HEY MICKEY!

Chris sics Sal on him and Draco is chased away.

Chelsea: I'm not sliding in that stuff.

Angee: Yes you are. *picks up Chelsea and tosses her down the slide*

Chelsea: EWAH! IT'S TAPIOCA!!! IT'S EVERYWHEEEEEEERE!!!

Chelsea runs off to go clean herself up.

Everyone else gets a turn on the slide.

After that is done Draco comes back with a sandwich.

Chris: Where's Sal?

Draco holds up sandwich. He was pecking me so I made him into a sandwich.

Chris grabs sandwich out of his hands and holds it close to his face soaking it with big fat tears.

Chris: SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!!!!

And the rest of the day was spent in the gardening section burying the half eaten sandwich. While Draco sings "Danny Boy".

What havoc will be ensued tomorrow?

Well that's it for chapie 10 hope you enjoyed! Plz read and review.

IN LOVING MEMORY OF:

SAL


	11. Chapter 11

**Harry Potter & Co. Go to the Grocery Store**

Author's note:

Yeeeeea .. So I actually wasn't planning on taking this any further, buuuuuut since I've been threatened with bodily harm by my readers if I don't continue... well let's just say that's enough incentive to me to keep trudging forward with it. So here we go! P.S adding new characters for new inside jokes.

And OH MY ROWLING I own nothing Harry Potter related!

The sound of happy little birds and the feeling of that smiley faced sun warms and brightens the room.

Everyone: Yaaaaawn. *stretch*

The peace is shatters as the author materializes out of thin air and slams her giant mallet through the floor.

Author: Up and atem you stupid lazy bums!

Ron: Who in the hall are you?

Author: (In a booming voice) I am the almighty author that controls your destiny!

Ron: I call shenanigans.

Author: Oh do you now?

With a wave of the Author's magic wrist Ron is ingulfed in light. As the light disapears everyone screams.

Ron: What?

Luna pulls a mirror from her handy dandy european shoulder bag. And holds it up for Ron to see.

Ron: AHHHHHHHHH! What have you done to me?

Author: I've turned you in to the one thing no one wants to be! JUSTIN BEIBER!

Ron: NOOOOOOOOOO! Change me back!

Author: Not till you apologize for questioning how great I am!

Ron: Never!

Author: Then the only other way to change back is to travel to Mordor and destroy the ring by dropping it in to the volcano!

Ron: Ok... Wait what?

Author: Oh balls, wrong story. Let's not wander in to Tolkien territory, that place is terrifying and long winded.

Harry: What in the hell are you talking about?

Author: NEVER YOU MIND!

Harry: WELL YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO YELL!

Harry runs off crying.

Author: *blink blink* Anywho... where were we?

Hermione: You were just telling Ron what he has to do to be changed back.

Author: Oh right right.

Ginny: Wow she has the attention span of a fly surround by various poo piles.

Author: SILENCE! Or I shall hurt your face!

Ron: Just tell me what I need to do.

Author: You must scour the ends of the earth to find a copy of the PS2 game Suikoden 5.

Everyone: ... For cereal?

Author: No for me, I can't find that game anywhere.

Macie: *Facepalm*

Ron: I could just poof you one.

Author: BUT IT WOULDN'T BE THE SAME YOU CHEATER!

Hermione: *sigh* I feel another trip to walmart is coming.

Angee: You're damn skippy it is! TO THE PIMP MOBILE!

Draco: Colt 45 and two zig zags baby that's all we need!

Hermione smacks Draco in the back of the head.

Hermione: No! Just no!

Draco points at the author.

Draco: She makes me do it.

Author: It's true.

Hermione: *sigh* Let's go.

And they all head to the pimp mobile. Will they find the game? Will Ron every be changed back? Is the author really that much of a nerd? Will they ever stop making really stupid Power Rangers shows that will never live up to the original? Will these questions get answered? We shall see.

Thanks for reading! please review and let me know how I did on my first time writing this "story" again. :)


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